Married… With Children

Tonight, my wife was watching one of her favorite shows, Rescue Me. We both enjoy Dennis Leary’s humor, and this show is a lot of fun. Leary’s character has been juggling several different women with an estranged wife and a newborn at home. This is one aspect of the show I just can’t enjoy. I know we are supposed to see his character with all of his ugly warts exposed, but I tire easily of this sort of prattle. She likes Desperate Housewives too. Shows where cheating spouses are a central theme just annoy me. I find it difficult to enjoy anything else the show has to offer.

I may be wired differently than most men. Within a few minutes of meeting someone, especially women, I find some way to bring up my wife in the conversation. It’s completely subconscious. A friend of mine once took me to a club where we met several VERY attractive women. This one particular young lady had taken an interest in me and within five minutes I was telling her all about my beautiful young bride. I am completely uncomfortable in situations like that.

Right after Lindsay Lohan came of legal age, and before she became anorexic, I was having this wonderful dream. I was at a party and she was there. She was dressed in a green satin soccer uniform, and she was gorgeous. In my dream, we talked and laughed. We went outside and kicked a soccer ball around, and fell in the soft grass laughing. She rolled over and leaned in to kiss me. I put my finger on her lips and said, “I can’t, hon, I’m married.”

IN MY OWN DREAM!
What kind of fair is that?

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed! Filed under Random | Comment (0)